A major event

Caleb broke his leg. Both bones about mid way between knee and ankle. He was jumping from the window sill above my bed onto my bed and his leg got caught between the wall and headboard. Funny thing is, i had asked him probably 5 minutes before it happened not to jump that day. He had nodded in agreement; then i heard the snap. He pulled his leg out from being stuck and while i wanted to freak out, i knew he needed me to be calm so i slammed the lid on my emotional bottle and stayed calm. 

I called the dr to figure out where to go. 

i called rob to come home from work (thank heaven he works close to home and they let him go for the day).

i chatted with caleb. 

i got really scared and helpless feeling. 

 This is at st. marks hospital. we went here because it was close and covered by insurance. unfortunately they couldn't do much so they put him in this lovely splint and told us to go to primarys. 

after four hours of waiting around. 

Caleb was phenomenal at this ER. 

he hardly cried and was so brave. 

i was so proud and grateful to him for not making me hear him scream. 

Later, i got in touch with primaries and of course they sugessted we go into the ER there. 

so we spent that evening at the ER in primaries. 

it did not go nearly as well as at st. marks. 

Caleb was exhausted and scared of everything and my soul was ripped to shreds listening to my brave boy wimper and cry. 

the worst was when they put him in the cast.  

that was when the lid popped off my emotional box and i cried and cried. 

The meds they had him on hightened his already-intense-scared-four-year-old emotions.

I didn't need meds. i was scared, tired and worried for him 

i haven't experienced those emotions yet as a mother. 

it was sorta like a horrible initiation into parenthood. 

But we made it home, got him a spot set up on the couch and he has been so good.

The emotions are intense. He gets so frustrated and i feel so bad for him.

praise heaven for netflix!!!!!!!!! 

Santa came, bringing the asked for excavator for caleb. 

the pony for colton (who got an excavator under the tree)

 it was heartbreaking he could't play and dig that morning.

 Ironically, colton has been even happier than usual having been free from big-brother pestering. 

he is growing up and making his mark on our family as he figures out what it means to be almost-two. 

 Thankfully, caleb how has a wheelchair and is able to move around a bit. so much better than the couch. Eating at the table was the big, exciting evolvement. Even though he "got to" eat on the couch he missed eating with the family. 

i liked that he missed us. 

To say this has been an emotional time is an understatement. All he has is yelling and he has put it to good use in dealing with the difficulties facing him. 

i dont' blame him one bit. 

My heart breaks for my poor son. Seeing him in the wheelchair has been sobering. 

I have a whole new level of respect, courtesy and awe of parents of chronically ill children, or children with disabilities. 

**On a happy note, Rob and I celebrated 9 years of marriage on dec. 27

This spring marks 13 years since we met. 

We are still blissfully happy together.